Thursday, August 11, 2005

Love is:

Last night at 11:30 coinciding with the end of the Daily Show...

With no warning:

MY TOENAIL FELL OFF.

JUST LIKE THAT. GONE.

WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!

Jason was already in bed so I went upstairs in a panic to find out if the onset of leprosy would impact his level of dedication and worship at the Church of Jen.

Me: My toenail fell off for no real apparent reason. Look, my toe is bald!!!! You have to still love me if I have leprosy. You're locked in.

Jason: Of course, and when your nose falls off I'll even describe the smell of your farts for you.

MY FARTS people - not flowers, not spring rain, not fresh snow. My farts.

and just like that romance died but I couldn't care less because he would describe the smell of farts to his noseless, limb dropping wife - now that is fucking love.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is truly beautiful!! You got it all girl (except for a toenail and possibly eventually a nose).

Jen said...

No leprosy here...just a blister under the toenail from the hike in to our cabin in algonquin park. phewf losing my nose would be waaay too awkward.

aviva said...

true love indeed. and i'm glad it was just a nasty rumour about tailbone tats and epidurals. phewf indeed...

kelly said...

I ran a half-marathon in March, and bruised my second toe -- you know, the one next to my big toe. What's that called anyway? So yes, it had been threatening to fall off for months and it finally did about a month or so ago.

Im pleased to report that it's replacement has grown in smoothly, and Im not left with defective feet. Although there is something to be said for walking around in sandles with a bald toe ;)

kutz said...

hi i was just browsing. this post is just amazing, i think you deserve the credit. :)